Please note... I have a terrible habit of forgetting to check my announcements. So, if you have something important you need to impart to me, it might just get overlooked if it's sent in an announcement. Sorry. I'm kind of a shitty God. heh.






***PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENTS***

"I'm not racist, but..." | Posting the same message in more than one forum | Typing in all capital letters | Netiquette | We are not doctors | Post Partum sex | Unique baby names

For One Week Only! ***** For One Week Only! ***** For One Week Only!

For one week only, Carys "All-you-can-eat-boobie-buffet" Ehlwinn will be speaking at <INSERT LOCAL MALL HERE> about her best-selling book Poetry for the Literarily Challenged. The book, originally published in 1978 is a compendium of the author's most popular, bizarre or outrageous quotes and writings. Carys has been touring across <INSERT COUNTRY HERE> for the last three months performing select readings from the book, and answering questions from the media and fans. If you want to get in on this amazing opportunity to hear Carys Ehlwinn speak live, in person, then make sure you get to <INSERT LOCAL MALL HERE> early, because the seats are likely to fill fast! As a special incentive, the first 50 people through the door receive an autographed copy of the author's newest book The Big Book of War - a Treatise on Zapp Brannigan. (retails for $39.95)

Not familiar with Carys Ehlwinn or her book Poetry for the Literarily Challenged.? Well, below are some excerpts from the most recent edition for your perusal.

Carys on Drugs:

"I'm a staunch proponent of ending cannabis prohibition. Cannabis prohibition has failed, and it's ruined too many lives. Adults should not be made criminals for using a substance that has been proven to be safer than tobacco or alcohol. I believe that cannabis should be legalized, taxed, regulated and sold to adults. Legalize, Regulate, Educate, Medicate." - pg. 420

Carys on Abortion:

"Abortion should be legal. Absolutely. It may be trite, but my body, my choice. That's what the issue is. Women (and nature) have been performing abortions since time began, it isn't some new invention. The change is that it's a hell of a lot safer now. Making it a criminal action just forces women back to using coat hangers." - pg. 119

Carys on Religion:

"I vacillate between the label Atheist and the label agnostic. I don't believe that there's any greater, supernatural power out there, but I realize that it's impossible to know, well, anything at all for certain. It's all just a best guess, based on how we interpret the data that our senses provide. Some think that Secular Humanism qualifies as a religion, I'm not sure that I do. But if I had to pick a definitive label, yeah, that'd be it. Secular Humanist." - pg. 6-7

About the Author:

Carys Ehlwinn is a 29 year old human female, with one husband and one child, a son. She has a temporal homesickness for the 1970s. She has Borderline Personality Disorder (or BPD for those who prefer acronyms). Her MBTI is INFP, emphasis on the iNtuitive. Her biggest pet peeve is when people misuse the word irony. She really, really hates Emos. She is an insomniac. Her Political Compass score is Economic Left/Right: -8.00, Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -9.38. You can find out more about her on Myspace and on Facebook.

Thanks hun