Hi there! My name is Karyn, I'm 27 and I have a beautiful and funny little girl, Autumn. She was born on February 6th 2008 (eight days late!   ) by induction, an epi, 13 hours of labor and 45 minutes of pushing, all during a huge snowstorm! She is the happiest baby I have ever met, shes always smiling! I can't wait to see the person she grows up to be. I'm a dog groomer turned SAHM turned room service server at the Amway Hotel in Grand Rapids and who turned back to grooming dogs again, was unemployed for over a year after losing my Jeep (my 2nd baby) in a rollover accident at the end of March 2010, but I was lucky enough to get a job I love at a pet store in August 2011 and am still there (YAY!). As for "hobbies", I hang out with Autumn whenever I possibly can (right now it is 6 days a month, my ex got his way with parenting time....  ) but I am in the process of changing that. When I DO get some "me time" I LOVED to go off road with my lifted Jeep (a Grand Cherokee--R.I.P. Rubber Duck, you are greatly missed). And now that I cant do that, I read, surf the net, do needlepoint, hang around BG to answer questions, use GIMP to create things, and more currently I have started to make jewelry. Music is a huge part of my life and I watch a lot of movies. I've recently gotten into throwing darts and drag racing since being with my SO. I just went through a rough divorce and wish that man would be more reasonable/mature about it all, but life isn't easy in that respect. I cant believe Autumn is already 4! Goodness time sure does fly...


Here's my story (because it's pretty damn crazy and I get asked all the time why I don't have Autumn much):
As some of you may know, I was separated from my (now ex) husband in April of 2009 after he called the police on me, saying that I hit him (I know, what a man right?) Which I most certainly did not. The police came, woke me up in the middle of the night, asked our sides of the story and told me to go back to bed and for him to stay on the couch. We didn't talk much during the next few days, and a week later I was woken up in the morning by the same police, they took me into custody (yes, arrested) and off to jail. A WEEK later!!! Now let me just say that my ex is very vindictive. I had told him a few months earlier, while getting an Christmas tree, that I wanted a divorce (we were in a very rough spot, and I did mean it) but we stuck it out for a couple more months (almost 4) until his birthday, when he did everything he could to make me feel horrible for making "his day" terrible. (I took him horseback riding, got a hotel room, etc etc) That was the night I told him I wasn't going to take his shit anymore and that I wanted a divorce (again). Ended up getting papers to file, filled them out, but my intention for doing so was to make him fully aware that I wasn't going to take his BS anymore and that he needed to get his shit together (he had been laid off and on unemployment for awhile, I was working my ass off and he would still jump down my throat if things weren't done around the apartment, even though he spent all day there with Autumn). So make a long story short with that, I think he wanted to "get me back" for "filing" (which I had not filed anything yet) and got me arrested.

When they arrested me, there was a no-contact order placed, meaning I couldn't go back to the apartment (all I had was the clothes on my back) and I couldn't see/talk to him. So I was released 7 hours later and almost lost my job because of it. I ended up staying with my cousin for a few months, then moving in with my parents. During this time (4 months) I had to ASK to see my daughter, and was lucky if I saw her once a week. So after four months, my case finally went to the court (because he didn't drop the charges, even though the very first night he said he didn't want to press any, oh, and the day that they arrested me? he paid for my bail AND brought me my Jeep!!! wtf....). I showed up for the court date that would tell me my sentence and my lawyer was outside, he said "you can go home". Of course I was confused by this, so I asked why. He said "they have zero evidence that you hit him, so they dropped the case, he filed under false accusations" Can't tell you how happy I was!!!! Of course, this meant I had to be in contact with the man again...but at least I could have more time with Autumn, and there were no charges. So by this time the divorce was under way, and I had so much trouble getting the right parenting time. I did see her daily from June to about mid-September, but at a very big expense. I was court ordered to pick her up 8 miles from where he lives with his parents, which is 45 miles from where I was living. So I would drive there and pick her up at 9am every day, usually drive back home, and have to drive her back to the pick up point at 3pm, then back home again after work (I picked her up where I worked). But some days I didn't have the gas money (was making minimum wage, and had a vehicle that got 16mpg if i was lucky) so we would go to a park nearby if it was nice out....I feel so utterly horrible that my baby had to take 3 hour naps in her car seat.......he didn't care though. And a few times I even stayed in my Jeep overnight in my work parking lot (a 24hr store) because I didn't have the money to come get her the next day after going home. Needless to say, I am STILL up to my eyeballs in debt because of all this, 3 years later.

So in September 2009 I started a 1st shift job (which my shitty lawyer suggested so that I could get more overnights and have to pay less for child support.) That isn't quite what happened though.....I ended up only being able to have her overnight 6 days out of a month. Meanwhile, my ex was STILL unemployed, and had started going to school on taxpayer money. Wonderful right? So he got her all the time, and got to be lazy, while I continued to work my ass off and barely got to see her.

In November 2009 I moved in with my SO, which is 9 miles from where Autumn lives. (btw, the 1st shift job I was at was only 5 miles from my parents house, so moving in with SO I was again traveling 40 miles one way to work every day). So now I was so much closer to her, and still seeing her only 6 days a month. I love the FOC. (NOT). During this time, my ex didn't know I was living there, or seeing anyone (should say I didn't tell him that is.....his grand mother lives two houses down, so he slowly figured it out but I didn't tell him I was living here until after our divorce was finalized). So (unbeknownst to me because I had a shitty lawyer) I was fully divorced on January 26, 2010----YAY!!!! hehe......oh and on xmas and new years, ex denied me time to see her, based on the fact that he can't read our court order...anyway...

Fast forward to March 26, 2010, I wreck my Jeep on my 40-mile trek to work. Totaled it--rear ended a guy and rolled it into a ravine. Fantastic. So now I have no vehicle. Was searching for a new car the day before as it is, tax returns were coming back to me in 3 weeks, that's what I was going to use to get a new car. I let my employer know that I wouldn't have a way to work for about 3 weeks (not like I could walk there....) and one week later they let me know they didn't need me anymore. GREAT. So I sign up for unemployment (ex has been on unemployment since Dec 08 mind you.....) and assistance from DHS. Few weeks later, denied for unemployment because I "deliberately went against my employers will" (meaning I purposefully didn't go to work on the day of the accident) this is obviously not true, I have pictures of the Jeep to prove it! SO, there I was, May 2010, jobless, still no assistance being given.....OH! and to top it all off, the IRS "misplaced" part of my return (the part that included me claiming Autumn and the Earned Income Tax Credit--almost $4K!!) Ex decided that it was his year to claim her as well, which it is written into our divorce decree that it is my year....what does he do with his return? Lifts MY jeep (the jeep he has been driving for two years is in my name still) and proceeds to make late payments on it.

I just don't get it......I don't know what I did to deserve this....Karma is truly a bitch. And everything he is doing to me is hurting Autumn. She needs her mother, FAR more than 6 days a month. He doesn't care.

This experience has made me so much stronger, so much smarter. I have my weak moments, and they may be often, but I know that it cant last forever, and he will get his. I only hope Autumn comes away unscathed from this, as she is only 2 right now. (<---this was written in 2010)

Update--August 2010: Well, I'm still jobless, and still only seeing Autumn 6-8 days a month (although I had her for my four full weeks this summer--separate weeks, not a full month), but now I am enrolled in college and starting next Monday!   I'm so excited and glad that I am finally doing something to better my life.  

Update as of (almost) February 2011: wow......Autumn is almost 3!!!!! I realized the other day that just a few days ago marked one year since Ive been divorced...what an odd feeling that was! Anyway....So January 7th I started my second semester of college..still love it!! Autumn is doing great, she is so smart! I know I'm biased, but this is coming from complete strangers...I don't see her as any smarter than other kids her age, but I'm not really experienced with toddlers........Outside of all that, I am still unable to find a job, but continue to look! Still no car or license.*sigh* someday hopefully soon that will change. That's about it for not, schedule with Autumn is still the same unfortunately and doesn't look to be changing any time soon   But I love the time I do get with her. <3

Update as of July 2012: It's been some time since I've updated this story. My time with Autumn is STILL the same, even 3 years after we separated. I petitioned the court for more time with her (literally two more days a month because that's all my schedule will allow for currently) and for him to drop her off to me since I am still without a car. After talking the proposed schedule over with him (and of course he said "No way in hell. You're not getting any more time with her, how would you even be able to afford to have her two extra days a month?" (um, what?), he's so nice), the court decided to push the matter over to FOC to let them deal with it. Which basically means it will be months before anything is said/decided and in the end my schedule will stay the same. GRR. Anyway, Autumn is 4-1/2 now and the most amazing thing I've ever had the experience to see. She is just so dang adorable and funny and beautiful. After all the nonsense her father and I have and continue to go through, she is still thriving. She gets upset sometimes because she misses him when she's with me for more than a day, and that really gets to me, but she usually gets over it pretty quickly. As far as work (since I was unemployed as of the last update in Feb 2010), I actually found a job a short time after that update but left a couple months later after my boss (the owner) decided that we had too many "creative differences" for her to keep me working there. This came literally a week after she gave me a raise, so...yeah. I was going to school full time then, working full time, and trying to see Autumn as much as I could. I was living about 40 minutes away from school and work (with my parents), so I had to rely on my mom for transportation everywhere. I stopped going to school after the summer semester in 2011 (long story there, but I'm hoping to return this fall). I was lucky enough to find a job working at a pet store here (selling exotics and fish and furry animals) in mid August 2011 and have been with that company ever since (coming up on the one year mark!). Oh yeah, and in November 2011 I finally got my own apartment! It's a mile from my work, and I just recently got a bike to make the journey to and from work faster/easier. I have been accepted into a new program through the FOC called REACH which is there to help me get more financially stable and to take care of any past arrearage for child support (which they raised AGAIN btw...), as well as match me dollar for dollar up to $1000 to put towards college tution (or $2 per every $1 I save up to $1000 to put towards a downpayment on a house...OMG I am only 40pts away on my credit from being eligible for a mortgage...scary thought...and I'm not anywhere near ready to buy a house, but its nice that they have this program). My ex is getting worse, I just don't know what to do about his nonsense. Recently Autumn has started telling me the things he says when she is with him and lets just say its things he needs to never say in front of her. SO! Life is still hectic and money is still crazy tight, but I am getting stronger and smarter about all of this all the time. One day things will turn back in my favor (Autumn's favor really) and that will be the happiest day of my life  







I cant believe BG deleted all my old siggies!!!     I had some awesome ones...including ones for my deceased brother...DANG IT!!! slowly finding them again.......
























I absolutely love this siggy from Amanda<3








awesome siggie from {Aspen's Mommy}














Thank you SOO much to BabyInOven for this KOB!!   I <3 it! ^^^^^^^





Thanks so much to SEM+PAJ=RAJ for this word art graphic! ^^^^^^



Thanks to Cubana <3 for this graphic! ^^^^^^









thanks SO much to Christina TeamPinkx2 for this awesome graphic! ----->










love this one from McNeelyMama   ^^^






yikes.....i look super tan! lol...so wasn't...it was the middle of winter...this is an old pic...from 2006 i believe.



i found one for my brother! yay!











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